The time had come. It was time for me to get back on my anti-depressants. I put off, and held off for as long as I could, but the dreaded beast that is my depression has been rearing it's head for months. My reserve to fight it off is completely gone. I was fortunate enough to get an appt. with my Dr. for this past Friday and was relieved to learn that I could get back on my Elavil and continue to take it while we try and get pregnant. If we are lucky enough whether by my eggs(fat chance) or donor eggs, we will wean me off the meds. in a matter of a few weeks thereby minimizing any risk to a baby. The benefits to me outweigh the risks at this point. So this was all good news to me. The not so good news is actually bad news...my blood pressure is sky high. I had an issue with high bp a few years ago, it disappeared as abruptly as it showed up. So after monitoring my bp over the weekend I can't risk it any longer and have started Procardia to help get my bp under control. This is so crazy, I had no warning that my pressure was up, at the end of February it was normal and Friday it was 160/98, and last night it was 151/106....uh...not so good.
On the infertility front, hubby is reading the book I bought to help inform me about donor eggs. It definitely helped me with clarity about this decision. At this point we are still in a holding pattern, gathering information and hoping the economy stabilizes. As we are a one income family hubby wants to feel secure that his job is safe before we spend so much money on another chance to get pregnant. I hate the wait, but at least I don't feel all doom and gloom about being back on the Elavil, I have hope that we can still get pregnant and become parents together. Now I just need both of these meds to kick in and get me back on track health wise.