I have heat

Went to the RE's office today for another ultrasound to check progress of my ovaries and the thickness of my uterine lining. RE takes his normal peek at ovaries....he starts with the right side...the not so important side as there is no tube on that side. I have follicles....a good number of them. Impatient me asks about the left side...the so very important side. His response..."Yep, we have heat". He was pleased, I am responding well to the stimulation, I actually do better on meds. for super - ovulation than I did when doing IVF. It's been 10 months Oct 24th that I smoked my very last cigarette. I miss them sometimes, mostly when I am stressed, the rest of the time I can't stand the smell. I am hoping that the length of smoke free time will increase our chances this month. I have my last 5 units of Lupron in the AM and then my last Follistim injection in the PM. Come Sat. morning, I will be woken up by hubby at 8AM for my HCG in the rump shot. I know, your thinking, "what a wonderful way to wake up" a large jab in the butt by an even bigger needle. At this point in the cycle I get a little weepy, and I am so over being stabbed in the belly with sharp objects. I feel really good about this cycle, in a way I haven't since our very first try. I would hate to jinx myself or get my hopes up to have them dashed to the concrete floor like I jar of pickled eggs in a gas station. How does a person put themselves through all this without hope. Without hope what would be the point. A very fine line we walk to maintain some semblance of sanity.

It's been awhile so here is a random pic:

M & his friend N, photo shoot for School Dance Dept.

It HAS to happen

Not much to write about lately. Well, that is not exactly true. I am now no longer employed...and I love it. Hubby and I worked together for an independently owned and operated company, a large corporation purchased us and unfortunately for me they do not allow family members to be employed based at the same location. Poor Hubby, he was the one who had to inform me. I handled it well at first, then I was sad, then angry, and now...I am loving it.

It is amazing how much you can done at home when you don't work outside the home. Our house is sooo clean. Crazy thing has happened...I have begun to cook again. Sounds crazy that I didn't cook, well, we are always on the go and with Hubby working together it was next to impossible to prepare a meal during the week. Eating out afforded us the opportunity to eat together as a family. M & R are loving eating at home and R loves to help in the kitchen, sometimes she says she wants to be a chef.

My stress level is much lower, amazing considering the financial state of our country. Fortunately, Hubby never factored my income into our family budget, everything is based solely on his income. For now I will enjoy the freedom to run my house and spend time with the kids like I have always wanted. My whole family has stated they would prefer me not work, they like me better this way. Back to the lower stress level, after the failed cycle my next period started 12 days after the initial one. Had a visit with the RE and he said that the abrupt stop of the Lupron screwed up my cycle and the bottom fell out....literally. It has been forever since I had a period that severe. The RE asked me to wait for another cycle before we start the med. process again, in the meantime we used this cycle to try on our own. A girl has to have her hopes and dreams, who knows, less stress may mean success.

My desire to have a child with my hubby has not diminished with time, in fact as I age I feel the tug at my heart increasing. I live with the thoughts that "It just HAS to happen".

A new cycle

Today was the beginning of super ovulation #5. and cycle day 3. The appt. with the RE went well, I have one follicle that is ahead of the other's. It is on my right ovary, wont do me much good as there is no tube on that side. The plan is to get the other 8 or so follicles to catch up so we can get some good ones on the left side. Had my blood work and off to work I went. Tick - tock, time to pick up my kids for a trip to the Ped. for some immunizations, and physical for R. She is such a little lady, 4'11" and 71 lbs, she was terrified to get her shots but she was a trooper and did well. In the meantime I received a call from the RE's office, my estrogen level is in the low 90's, not really that great, it should be in 40's to low 50's. We decided since Insurance covers this 100% to just go for it and see what is going on come Friday. If it seems like its headed wrong due to the one big follicle we will tank the cycle and wait till next month in hopes of avoiding a cyst.

We started with 5 units of Lupron and 360 units of Follistim injections. And we are off.....